Every parent faces the reality that their children have a will of their own, which I think most would agree is a good thing in and of itself. But parents also face huge external pressure to control their children; the way your child behaves is after all a direct reflection of how good a parent…
Category: relationships
How to Be a Supportive Partner
The single most desirable quality in a partner today is perhaps that they be a supportive one. But who actually has such a gem? Are they a myth? After 18 years with the same partner and so many ups and downs with her and our now 6 children, I believe that having a supportive partner…
Of Teenage Dreams and Towel Pics
Our Storyteller (13) had a dream that she shared with us just a couple weeks ago at breakfast. She was clearly perturbed by it, and being a verbal processor, she really needed to share it with us. In her dream she was in our house, sleeping in her room in the basement, when she woke…
Bookstore Date
Jessica and I had one of the best dates last night, revisiting an activity that was a staple in the early years of our relationship: hanging out at a bookstore. We love books. Going to a bookstore is like revisiting old friends. Revisiting ourselves, the way we were, and retracing what we’ve become. Stories dot…
Fighting Alongside Our Children
Parents are teachers. How many times do we say the same thing over and over in the same exact way and the message just doesn’t seem to get through? As a private piano teacher for 20 odd years, it has been my job to find the exact formula that would reach my student; the metaphor,…
My Anger Problem
I was recently asked by someone who has known me for a very long time: “Why are you so angry?” I was shocked at the question but it led to a good, long conversation. I do get angry, and it has been known to come out in my writing, but I don’t think of it…
Beyond Yelling
We have chosen not to spank our children and we aim to parent with respect and gentleness. This is a departure from how we started (though, to be honest, we would have told you we were parenting with respect and gentleness with spanking and yelling because we believed it was necessary) and it has been…
Beyond Relationship Advice
Did you know that every 5 minutes an article is published on the topic of romantic relationships? Actually, I just made that up. But it sure feels that way. From blogs to articles featured on trusted online news sources, newspapers, magazines, self-help books, talk shows, virtual discussion forums, to local discussion groups for men, women,…
Why We Stopped Spanking our Children
“This hurts me more than it hurts you.” I never once believed this to be true when I would use a spanking or a hand slap to discipline my young children. I believe that dealing with the reality and implications of being hit is way more difficult and painful than the feelings associated with hitting…
Why We Should Model Respect for our Children
A few nights ago I dreamt that I was back in High School, which really isn’t correct, because I grew up in France and this was clearly an American high school. So I was “back” in high school in the athletics department with a bunch of really ripped and intimidating guys. And they were bullying…