Our younger children are fully embracing our clothing-optional home life. I would post pictures, but, well, they’re naked. I do wish we could be more free to post pictures of our children “au naturel” because their innocence serves as a great reminder that my hangups and shame associated with my own body – and nudity in general – are my own. And their little butts are just too cute!
And I do have my own issues. Though my views have changed a lot since having children, especially when it comes to children seeing other family members naked, my feelings and behavior have only changed a little. I am still not comfortable being naked around anyone. But, for the sake of my children, I don’t freak out if they walk in on me changing, or getting out of the shower.
Naturally, there are possible consequences to playing in your birthday suit in the house, and we discuss these often. For instance, we ask them how they would feel if their 4 yr old neighbor and friend came over to play and they were naked in our living room? There are times when we ask that they be naked somewhere that we don’t consider to be a common family space, and that they put clothes on for meals. But we are very careful to do so without using shame. My shame is my own. And I do not want them to be ashamed of their bodies, or even of being naked.
So we have naked children in my house this morning, playing with Legos, watering our little seedlings and spraying each other, and generally running around being innocently adorable. But I won’t be sharing any pictures with you.
How do you approach nudity in your house with your children? Have your views changed at all since having children? How do you deal with your own feelings of shame when it comes to parenting?
~ Jeremy
PS: do you know how screwed up our society is? I had to think and think about whether I could actually admit publicly that I think little kids’ butts are cute for fear of being labeled some kind of pedophile. There is a huge distrust of men when it comes to children. I hate that.
PPS: Here are some pics of my kids playing today (the day after I wrote the above post); granted, they;re not naked, but I still probably wouldn’t normally have posted this anywhere – my stance may be changing:
I’m glad to see our family is not alone in this. Even our oldest now 8 comes home and strips we have always said so long as the kids are comfortable we are comfortable. I’m glad they are at home in their skin. I am personally looking forward to several more years of naked babies. The innocence of that time in their lives is gone way too soon.
I love that. Thank you for sharing. 🙂 ~ Jeremy
I love this… my two youngest hate clothing, so most of their pictures are them in only a diaper. Which I can’t share because people get butthurt about naked babies and report me to FB. Grr.
I hear you. Our culture’s fear of nudity (and shame of our own bodies, and fear of what other people might do with the images) is spectacular. And it only serves to perpetuate these issues. It also creates issues where there should be none. For instance, parents have to constantly second-guess themselves to make sure that they aren’t offending other people in their parenting choices; like letting their children run around naked. Or play in the yard without direct supervision. And the list goes on and on. Where there should be encouragement and support there is fear of being reported (to FB, to CPS, etc). So sad. ~ Jeremy
I grew up in a house comfortable being naked or in just underwear. My husband did not. He’d never seen his dad in underwear till he was a teenager and got caught sneaking in one night. I don’t care if the boys see me change heck my oldest son(now 7) showered with me until he was 4. I have a ton of hang ups about my body but I will not put those on my kids. I love reading your blog and Facebook post. 🙂
I recently had a picture removed from Instagram – it was the butts of my 18 month old and her 14 month old cousin. Very frustrating! We live in Florida – my child is naked 80% of the time because it’s hot and we’re always playing in the hose.
But, from another perspective, I was raised in a clothing optional home. I loved it, but it had its downsides. My brother, who was two years older, started feeling much more uncomfortable sooner than I did – because he was going through puberty, and I was only two years behind him. He didn’t feel he could just invite his friends home from the bus, ecetera – and so I started feeling embarrassed too. I think it’s harder when you have boys and girls in the house!
Honestly, most people treated us like we were freaks. That sense of shame really permeated my feelings about my naked body. I felt like other kid’s parents thought I was bad, and once I hit puberty and realized what they thought, I realized people thought I was promiscuous. I was called a ‘slut’ in seventh grade, and that feeling about myself stuck.
I know it’s not my parent’s fault; they were going against the grain and trying to be body-positive. But unfortunately, children don’t just internalize their family’s messages – they internalize the message of society too. I hope you live in a kinder place than I did.
You’re right. There’s is a huge distrust in men. I will admit to being one of those people that doesn’t trust men…or women with my kids, but more so men. Thank all the a-hole men out there raping and molesting children…sometimes to death. That’s where our fear of men comes from.
in parenting I have always been very open and comfortable with nudity. My stand is, bodies- everyone had one and they are all beautiful. nothing dark or dirty. so it was just no big deal to my kids. they showered with me. saw me change because I don’t like closed doors. they were free to roam naked at will at home, in the yard. as they got older- nearing puberty for my boys- they didn’t want me to see them naked anymore. and that was fine. My 15 year old daughter was similar, but not as strict about it as the boys. My behavior never changed. one son rolls his eyes and averts his gaze if he happens past my room when I’m changing. ( he’s 19 now)
Even though I didn’t grow up in a comfortable home I always wanted my kids to be comfy in their own skin. My twelve year old covers up because that is her choice. My nearly 9 old runs around fully naked and loves it. Our only boy in the home is two and strips the moment he walks through the door. I can’t keep clothes on him even when company comes over. It’s his choice. I’m happy my girls will be comfortable with knowing the male anatomy in a very innocent way. It takes away the wonder as they become adults. All my kids see me naked too. They come into my room as I’m changing or showering. I warn them I’m naked but they don’t care and come in anyway. We love being comfortable in our own skin!